Monday, September 21, 2009

Fall Foolishness

Fall arrives tomorrow! The countdown begins for Halloween, the 2nd biggest party of the year for New Yorkers, after New Year's Eve. Every year it gets bigger, sillier, and more annoying.

Last Halloween was absolutely dreadful. I actually went to a Halloween party at a club. It was ticketed event with a 2-hour open bar. Yes, I said ticketed. For those of you who don't know how Manhattan works on major holidays, here's a crash course: restaurants and bars will have ticketed events in order to control the traffic into their establishment. Hard to believe, but there are NOT enough restaurants and bars to serve all of Manhattan AND outside visitors all looking to go out for food, fun, and drinks. So, no ticket, no entry.

These types of parties seem like a good idea - open bar, maybe they actually offer some finger foods, everyone is in costume, there's a DJ. Lots of fun, right? No so much. People drink too much on holidays. Open bars end up with more people just getting stupid. And when you've had enough, it's tough to even walk on the sidewalk with some streets being closed for Halloween parade traffic. Getting a cab is even tougher.

I've never seen so many people staggering drunk on the sidewalk and wearing cheap and ill-fitting lingerie. Halloween in New York sucks. It has become an excuse to wear underwear in public and drink to excess. You are guaranteed to see a few arguments with police, public urination, and the obligatory tourist puking on the sidewalk. When did Halloween become a day to wear lingerie? Has it always been so? Check out these vintage pictures Dover Publishing has been giving away: a witch in her underwear and what I assume is a party-goer in her "daisy dukes."

Remember when Halloween used to be about candy instead of beer? and clever costumes instead of bedroom costumes? I miss those days! Halloween used to be a great holiday for kids to hang out with friends and beg for candy. Maybe you went to a Halloween party and bobbed for apples. maybe someone's Dad put together a Haunter House. My Dad had a "walk of horror" where he would blindfold you and put your hand in different disgusting things - a bowl of spaghetti was someone's innards, a hot dog was a severed finger, a jar of olives was eyeballs! Ewwwwww! You screamed but let him put your hand in the next food item.

I'm not looking forward to this year's Halloween. We plan to have a few friends over and stay in Brooklyn, away from the drunken revelry. Maybe some kids will come by and beg for candy!


Put on lingerie,
time for Halloween parade!
Drink, dance, and vomit.


1 comment:

Huck's Ship said...

I'll miss holloween,
leaving New Orleans for home.
What fun it could be!

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